Wedding Crashers

Several friends have commented in recent months that they plan on crashing the wedding, since we weren’t able to invite them. This has become an especially popular joke in recent weeks, as we get closer to the big day.

Let me just say for the record: that shit ain’t funny.

I get that it’s (presumably) meant in good fun, but it’s hard to have a sense of humor about it after awhile. We’re charged per person that walks in the door of the venue, and given that it’s a NYC wedding at a private venue rented out for the whole evening, it ain’t cheap.

When I say they’re charging per person at the door, I mean there’s literally going to be a doorman counting people as they walk in. So naturally, my paranoid/cynical self immediately insisted on us giving a guest list, so that nobody walks in the door (and thus incurs a big expense to us) without having been pre-approved. So all you clever friends (and/or neighborhood crazies) thinking of crashing the party?  NO SUCH LUCK.

He’ll be like this, but presumably more intimidating.

The good news is, it’s a package deal, so the per-person cost covers admission to the venue, premium open bar for six (!!!) hours, bartenders, cocktail servers, a light tech, a sound tech, and an event planner to manage all the deliveries and such day-of. It includes pretty much everything except food, entertainment, and photography.

The bad news?  See above: the per person cost ought to cover all of that, considering the price tag.

But hey, it’s a beautiful venue, and we both fell in love with it when we took a tour. You walk in and it screams, “Kevin and Sal!” at you. If we’re going to do a fancy wedding rather than a quiet courthouse signature, we’re going to invite as many people as we can fit in the building… and if we’re going to go big, we may as well do it in style.

Trust us, we would’ve loved to have welcomed all of our friends to the big day, but it just wasn’t possible. However, there’ll be a ton of stuff happening that weekend, so by all means plan on coming to celebrate with us sometime other than Sunday night.

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